- Don't think about what are their types or whether or not they are someone's type
- Don't ask why they are still single
- Don't get jealous or envious while they are embracing what they have
- Don't beat themselves up when they make mistakes
- Don't sit around and wait for the opportunity to knock on their door
- Don't give up and give in easily
- Don't live up to anyone's standard or judgement
- Don't lose hope
- Don't forget to laugh and smile
- Don't think negative things
- Don't get up in the morning and think "Just another day!"
I lately notice that since I have been comfortable about myself, it does not really matter a lot to live up to someone’s expectation or even judgment. The moment I see myself as an individual person trying his best to live his own life to the fullest as he can is a great moment of self-acknowledgement. Being alone is not as scary as before, and the feeling to be loved is not as desperate as before.
What is the first thing you think when you are alone? What is the first thing you see yourself when you look in the mirror? What is the first thing you ponder when it comes to living your life? When you are comfortable with yourself, and when you think that you are the creator of your own happiness, that is when you really do not need the other person to make you feel better about yourself or happy. More important than that is you are not afraid to be alone and end up single forever. We, as human, are afraid to grow older alone and have no partner, but the question is did we live a life to the fullest when we were young? I think that’s a serious matter that is more important than being afraid of growing old and single. So start living your life, for now is how we shape our future.
2008-10-28
Looking back at my life, what are three problems from my past that have paved the way for positive growth and how did this occur?
- It would be my low self-esteem - it was my major problem in life that made me frustrated all the time. For the most part, I often think that I am never good enough for anyone, but I finally learn how to live my life and improve myself in every aspects of life to higher my self-confidence and self-esteem.
- Being not comfortable with myself - this was such a pain experience in my life. I looked up to other people but failed to realize that at the end of the day, all I have with me is me. I start to see that my self-image has been better and I am very comfortable with myself.
- Taking things and people for granted. I think we all do that in life to some point. Subconsciously, I self-reflect all the time. Therefore, nowadays I learn to enjoy things and people around me, and no more taking them for granted.
Yesterday, Boise State University (BSU) has an Immigration Attorney’s workshop from
This reminds me that if we have a positive attitude towards something that we did, we will not beat ourselves up. In the above scenario, if I would come back home and think that “Oh my god, what was I thinking. There were people in the room, and I asked those types of dumb questions. Listen to my voice, I was such a nervous wreck,” I would be just trapping myself in low self-confidence and destroy my own self-worth as an individual to exercise my right of speech. Instead, I admit it was a little bit hard, but I am sure that the more I do this, the better I will feel about it in the future. Practice makes perfect.
Election date is getting close here in the
Have you ever been wondering why you are single? Isn’t it too much that friends ask you that why you are still unattached, and that you have to second on asking yourself the same question? Sure the way you response to others might be different to the way you response to yourself. But our mind is like a search engine, when we ask it, it will try to search for answers for us. Most of the time, self-talk about being single is usually not a good thing, and why do I say that? Because subconsciously, you already think that being single sucks, being single is lonely, being single has to do with some personal issues, so on and so forth, and therefore, when you ask the mind to search for answers based on these negative assumptions, all you got are negative answers about yourself, and that destructs your self-image.
From times to times, it doesn’t matter that much of why you are still single. You know yourself well enough to know why, and the reason why I said it doesn’t matter that much because being single is a simple thing. Do not over complicate it. It’s not hard or deep to understand, and you really don’t need a “because” to understand being single. I would say that live your life to the fullest as you can, quit asking the mind about why you are single, but instead, put all your energy to live your life and ask the mind about how you can live your life the way you want it to be, and eventually, things will work out on their own. When you live your life 100%, you will realize that being single really doesn’t bother you much because you are too busy and have too much fun living your exciting life. That’s being said, your happiness is built within yourself whether or not you are single or couple.
I asked a friend on the Internet that the city where he lives in is big, and why he’s still single? He said it’s hard for him.
“It’s hard for me.” I hear it clear and loud via the chat messenger. I always believe in individuality and hate to generalize people. I completely understood what he was saying. Sometimes in life, things work for you but not for others. The way you approach people is different than that of others. I don’t judge people when they say it’s hard for them. Indeed, it is because that’s how they are no matter whatever reasons that make them be. They have their own way of doing things and approach people. By trying to give the lesson just seems so stupid acting like you know it all, and even know him very well. You are not him, you cannot really relate to what he has been through and what he’s doing in his own life.
So next time when a friend says that to you, don’t try to mock him/her by making mocking sound or by trying to be him. You can show your caring by just listening and understanding him/her as an individual. What areas that he or she think it’s hard, he or she already realizes that but just not willing to or afraid to make a change – inner change so to speak. You are responsible only for your own action and change, and don’t even try to compare yourself with your friend because that never works. You two are completely different people and therefore have different perspectives and opinions.
So I went to
I feel that I have seen enough attractions in
We also visited
Overall, I think the trip was fun. Some Texans do drive crazy though, hehe.. But I am able to cross out another state from my “states list,” and you know what that means! It means that my refrigerator now has another two cities magnet on it –
Attached here are just some photos that I took on the trip, to view more, click on the Nomad Dude link on the top to see my trip’s photo collection site.
Tonight, when I was taking my contact lens off, I realize that I have been taking my whole body from toes to head for granted the whole time. I over looked the fact that they are all healthy and failed to appreciate that fact. How many times in our life we don’t like this and don’t like that about our body. Some conduct a surgery, some get their noses done, and some even try to change their skin colors (Michael Jackson, for instance.) I would like to give a few more examples, why would you want to read in the dark or stare at the computer all the time by hurting your eyes? Why would you smoke to release stress but destroy your health and worsen your teeth? Why would you go to bed so late knowing that your body’s function is no long as good as it used to be? Why would you want to be in an abusive relationship? Why would you over work out just to get a good body but break your muscles? Etc. I feel that, I need to start focusing more on how to stay healthy and take care of every part of my body well. Compared to others that do not have the whole package that I have or you have, we should feel appreciative about this given life and not taking it for granted. No matter how much you don’t like some parts of your body, you would have to live with it, and it’s what you have. You can upgrade it but not degrade it. Knowing that each part of our body functions for a particular task, imagine that you lose one part of the body, what would you do? And what would it be like? Of course with the advanced technology these days, they keep producing things that make life convenient for so called “disabled” people, but it will never be the same as original born and provided part. How many times I hate to wear contact lens everywhere I go to, but I realize that it’s time for me to take good care of my body’s parts moving on, and for all of you out there, if you have been doing that, then that’s great, if not, then join me with this staying healthy goal. Sleep well……….
I hope you all enjoyed the Presidential Final Debate tonight. Now it's time for my Q&A section.
- Stay healthy
- Keep improving myself physically and emotionally
- Love myself
- Show more gratitude toward my blessing
- Live my life to the fullest
- Create attainable goals and try to achieve them the best I can
- Meet more interesting people and make more friends
- Be cool, haha....
- Be myself
- Learn and see more new things and places
- Most often I feel that I am too independent. I have been living alone for a long time and finally it is "numb" for me to even realize how to live with another person.
- I enjoy my own space and time.
- I prefer doing things the way I want to and not listen to anyone trying to tell me what to do, unless I ask for. Look, I dyed my hair, haha... it was supposed to be dark blonde, but that color + black = red somewhat, hehe... and that's just the way I am. Do whatever I want to do.
- For the most part, I think that I am afraid of getting hurt.
To receive updates from "Live Life to the Fullest" blog, you may want to subscribe
To receive updates from "Live Life to the Fullest" blog, you may want to subscribe
- Be there for one another when needed
- Encouraging one another
- Honest and not lying
- Mean what he/she says and say what he/she means
- Not afraid to try new things out
- Laid back
- Funny
- Able to hold conversation
- Less lecturing but more understanding
- Compromising
To receive updates from "Live Life to the Fullest" blog, you may want to subscribe
- Coming to the United States
- Living alone and independently
- Trying new things
- Going to new places
- Self-reflecting
- Dating to figure out what my types are and what I am looking for
- I would have to say singer, haha... I loved to pretend I am one.
- Hanging out with those friends back home.
- My grandpa used to buy me "bao bao" to eat everytime I got up from napping. I guess that napping is a kind of activity too, but the main thing is that I do miss him a lot.
- Playing arcade with friends.
- Taking rain shower with friends until my mom yelled at, haha.... too big to do that now, they might think I am crazy, hehe....
Last night when I was answering the question about what are the things that I feel grateful about right now, there’s one item that really makes me contemplate about a lot, even this morning. It was the ability to afford things that I want. I would like to add to that, the ability to afford things that I want or need. Personally, I am pretty clear about want verses need. When it comes to what I want, I most of the time think and make a decision, but when it comes to what I need, regardless of the price, I go for it. However, the point is that how blessed is that to feel that you are in control of your wants and needs. That’s the exact position that I am in. Some friends might think that Pheng is no fun, he is afraid of spending money to go to a special night at the night club (i.e: The White or Black Party Night), or he is such a cheap ass, but you know what, I really don’t care much about these kinds of comments anymore. After all, when I become broke again, will they help me financially? When I am trying to live and pay my bills, will they work and earn money for me? Although those amounts of money to spend seem so tiny, but they can really add up. Consider that if I go to work and go to lunch five days a week, that’s a lot of money in a year. Although I don’t watch my finance very closely, I usually make the deposit and withdraw and then simply let the bank takes care of it, but I don’t just live to spend. I guess my spending habit is pretty conservative, and again it is a matter of wants and needs. But the fact that being able to pay for things that I want or need is just so good and I am totally thankful for that, as well as my job. I know some of you out there might be in a hard time situation financially, especially with how slow the world economy is now. You have bills to pay and live, and you have loans, mortgage, car payments, or debts to take care of, and it seems that those just never end. However, take a moment and think about your spending habits, are there any certain areas that you have to re-evaluate about your wants and needs? Generally speaking, spending money is a personal choice. Don’t let others get in the way to tell you how to spend your money, and don’t buy their pressures or just to impress anyone. After all, it’s your life and you need to be in the driver seat and yes, you hate the backseat drivers.
- Being healthy
- Being able to stay in the US and work
- My car
- My apartment
- My gadgets
- People to talk to when I feel down (Yes, I have that moment too!)
- My look, haha...
- My degree
- Being able to afford things that I want to have
- My beloved family no matter what they have done to me, haha.... I miss them all the time.
Recently, I have been thinking about life with and without school. I remember that when I was in school, I spend most of my time on homework and studying for quizzes, exams, etc. Since I graduated, I feel that I have more time to focus on other aspects of my life: self-growth, body, cooking skills, and other things that I wanted to do. But these things nowadays are just like typical habits that I often do.
It has been more than a year now since I have graduated. I sometimes do miss school, but I am afraid to go back. The reason is pretty simple, school stressed me out. The fact that I had to fight to get a better grade is totally different from the fact that I work hard on the job performance. One obvious thing is that I spend money to go to school but I get paid to work hard on the job. However, without that investment in education in the first place, I would not be able to get profits now.
This simply prompted me to think that, life is like a process. You were born, then you learn how to stand, how to walk, then you go to school to learn some literatures and sciences, after that you either go to college or straight to work. Some college graduates then start looking for jobs, and some start to form a family, etc. you name it. But for me, I know for sure what I want out of my life, and what I want out of this country. It just amazes me whenever I look at the things that I have been through since the beginning and how far I am right now.
I just want to say that life after school is great! Study hard now, everything will be paid off after you are out of school, then all you will be just like me free working out at home, haha…. Isn’t life good?
To receive updates from "Live Life to the Fullest" blog, you may want to subscribe- Visit places/cities/states that I have never been to.
- Watch series that make me just want to watch, haha... (i.e Heroes)
- Going to the ocean/lakes/hills
- Dine out/try out new restaurants
- Shopping for clothes, haha...
- Design web pages/blogs
- Take pictures for my blog
- Learn new things
- Improve myself physically and emotionally
- Decorate my place
Starting today, I am going to try to answer a few questions that are posted on a Life Coach's blog - Michael Moniz
- I don't cheat
- I am cute, haha....
- I have a car
- I have a job
- I am a very nice guy
- I am loving and caring
- I am very romantic, haha...
- I enjoy doing things together
- I am honest
- I have sense of humor
- Create a favorite icon - go to this site http://tools.dynamicdrive.com/favicon/
- Now add this piece of code to between the header tag of your site/blog. The header looks like this {header}.......{/header}
{link rel="shortcut icon" href="http://myfavicon.com/favicon.ico" /}
{link rel="icon" href="http://myfavicon.com/favicon.ico" /}Where the http://myfavicon.com/favicon.ico is the location where you hosted that favorite icon at, and don't forget to replace the { } sign with < > sign. Blogger restricts me from using the <> sign.
To receive updates from "Live Life to the Fullest" blog, you may want to subscribe
Lately, as you can tell that I have been designing and adding a few sections to this blog. Tonight, I have added the photo shoot gallery section. I was trying to find a code out there that does the photo sliding. I found a lot, but because of impatience and rushing, I picked whichever one that is available. After everything was set up and I committed the changes to the code, I started to browse around again. Then when I see another photo slider that is better, I felt that I should have used that instead.
The above instance makes me realize that how many times in our life we are not patient enough to look around and explore available options out there? We tend to jump into things pretty quick, even relationship wise.
To receive updates from "Live Life to the Fullest" blog, you may want to subscribeEverybody is going through different stressful moment, and you cannot really expect one to feel alright in a few days. Everyone is different. It might work for you in a short time period, but that does not mean it might work the same way for others. In our daily life, we often fail to think that way. Things become so personal that we forget to acknowledge the differences between people. We like to help, give suggestions, and even give advices, but we cannot really relate to one’s pain and stress. We think we do, but in fact we don’t. On the other hand, being a listener is good, but when time permits, then we can try to offer a few ideas or options. I am not asking you to be a “yes man,” but at the same time, just try to understand what a person or your friend has been through. Talk in a way that seems understanding rather than aggressively just to force him or her think the way you do. It will never happen that way. Sometimes, your good intention can become a bad one depending upon what that person was thinking. It is just how he or she is, you cannot really change that unless he or she is willing to change first. In brief, everyone has a down moment, but never ever try to use your own coping techniques or ideas to inject in your friend’s head and expect that the result will be the same. I have learned that we cannot really relate to a friend’s agony and down time, but all we can do is to be there for each other. Time can heal better than thousand words.
To receive updates from "Live Life to the Fullest" blog, you may want to subscribe
The Little Guide to Happiness: How to Smile Again - Over analyze a thing because we think it is more difficult than it is. - Five main misconceptions: o Hoping – hoping to be happy does not happy make. o Making a lot of money. o Other people – relying on another person to make you happy will not make you happy. o Attaining goals – a lot of people tell themselves, “If I only have this, then I would be happy.” They get it, and then they cannot figure out why they are still unhappy. o Positive thinking – without positive believing, you are doomed. - Cut out negative thoughts – focus on positive rather than negative. - Mind is a search engine - if you ask it a negative question, it will find negative answers for you. - Hatred and revenge is also horrible path to unhappiness – all the while as you try to make that person miserable, you are making yourself even worse. - People, who hold grudges and cannot forgive, cannot be happy. - Don’t just forgive others, but forgive yourself. Be easy on yourself. - Stay away from negative people who do not care to help themselves. - Antidepressants can help if only you have chemical imbalanced problem. - Exercises make you feel better. In the long run you will add years to your life, and they will be happy ones. - It is not the environment, but it is how you react to it. - Don’t be crappy, be happy. - Never give up. Once you stop trying, you can never know happiness - Stop what iffing. Iffing what iffing this or what iffing that is bad. - Stop worrying about what others think about you. Rather, start concentrating on what you think about them. Don’t over analyze things. Take life at face value. - Be grateful. - Get passion. - “If you think it is, then it is.” - Stop blaming others for our feelings. “You make me angry, make me unhappy.” - Do something for goodness sake. Don’t just do nothing. - Don’t complain or look for sympathy. - Make things fun: ask the mind how can I make my 10 hours shift fun today? - Successful person learns the lesson from the past, unsuccessful person still dwells on all the wrongs done to them. - Stop judging – you only focus the worst. Avoid stereotype, and give people a chance. - Don’t do anything in private that you would be ashamed to do in public. If you don’t respect, admire, or like yourself, then nobody else will. - Live with a high ethical standard. Guilt is a kill of joy. - Be good to yourself. Be your best friend. - It feels good to help others. - What you put out you get back. - Get back up on the horse once your ass is less sore. Don’t wait. - Nothing is impossible. - Control your own mind. - Unreal expectations can lead to unhappiness. Don’t expect to be happy all the time. - Laughter is the best medicine. - Jealousy stinks. - When you start wanting, you are forcing your mind, your search engine, to think up all the things you don’t have. - Worry is a waste. When you start to focus on solutions, the worry starts to dwindle. Act on those solutions. - Recognize hidden negative blocks. Recognize when it happens, and train our minds to trash this false notion. - Live in the moment and present. Don’t dwell in the past or worry about the future. - Pray or talk to God if that helps. - Use visualization techniques. Picture a happy movie or moment in your head and see yourself as a happy person. - Sitting on your butt can become a real pain in the ass. Sitting on your butt rather than going outside and getting some sun makes you pasty white like a vampire in a horror movie. Sitting on your butt rather than getting a job makes you unemployed and poor. Sitting on your butt rather than going out and socializing makes you lonely. Sitting on your butt rather than exercising makes you out of shape. Sitting on your butt only makes you ponder what should be, what could be, and what isn’t. And all those things make you sad. Get up and do something – anything! - Procrastination = stagnation = decay. - Even if the downside of what you risk happens, it’s still better than the monotony of a lifetime of doing nothing and living in fear. - Happiness is a journey not a destination. It’s not getting there that makes you happy; it’s taking the time to smell the roses on the way. - Lose your stubbornness and be willing to take advice and constructive criticism from others. Be honest with yourself. Don’t be Mr. Know-it-all.